Behold my neverending Xiuhan problems
May. 30th, 2015 04:36 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
sparklepoxTitle: Accustomed
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: Lu Han/Minseok
Word Count: 1638
Summary: Lu Han's body is Minseok's to take, but he would gladly give him more. (arranged marriage AU)
Notes: Thank you to Kayleigh for the prompt. ♥
Lu Han has shared Minseok's bed since the first day they met, the day they were married. That is what tradition dictates, that he be Minseok's in more than just name, in body and soul. (Soul, of course, is more difficult to quantify, so the customs have always focused on the body.)
The first time was obligation, though not such an imposition. Lu Han thought Minseok attractive, and Minseok wasn't selfish, ensuring that they both enjoyed it. Since then, it has become something Lu Han appreciates more and more. He loves Minseok's body, loves the way Minseok makes him feel, and little by little, he's coming to love Minseok himself.
That part is not tradition, though there's nothing that forbids finding love in an arranged marriage. Lu Han knows he's lucky to have that much, to have a husband he cares this much for, a husband who values him, as a friend, if nothing else. He can be content with that.
He doesn't think Minseok feels the same, though he can't be sure. They've become friends in the months since their wedding, talking comfortably together and laughing often. When they're alone (with the servants), Minseok sits close to him and touches him without hesitation, but in a casual, friendly way.
It's clear when they're in bed together that Minseok wants him like that, that he delights in Lu Han's body and cares that Lu Han feel pleasure too, that he's able have Minseok the way he wants him, but Lu Han is not so naïve as to take that to mean that Minseok loves him. It is what it is, no more, no less. But it's something, and that will have to be enough.
One evening, some six months after their wedding, a servant comes to tell them that the bath is ready, as usual. Minseok always goes first by custom, and bathes alone, but today, for the first time, he hesitates, turning to Lu Han. "Would you perhaps like to join me?" There's something deliberately casual about the question, like he's going out of his way to make it seem unimportant.
Lu Han is surprised, though he tries not to show it. Minseok has never asked Lu Han to join him before in all the time they've been married, and he doesn't understand what it means. Is there some significance to sharing a bath in this land, something all his lessons on their customs failed to touch upon? Does Minseok only want to have Lu Han in a different way than usual? But Minseok is so meticulous about cleanliness that Lu Han can't imagine he'd want to sully his bath like that.
Minseok must guess what he's thinking because he smiles crookedly and clarifies, "The bath is large enough for both of us. I only thought...it would be nice to have some company."
"Of course," Lu Han answers readily even though he still doesn't understand. "I'd like that."
The servants help Minseok out of his clothes first, and Lu Han tries not to be too obvious about watching as the heavy clothes that camouflage his shape fall away to reveal Minseok's small but strong body. Minseok notices anyway, but he only flashes Lu Han a small smile before turning to step into the bath, sliding down until the water covers everything below his shoulders.
Then it's Lu Han's turn, and Minseok makes no attempt to hide his interest as Lu Han's body is exposed. He's seen it all before so it shouldn't matter so much to Lu Han, having Minseok's eyes on him, but it feels different like this. His cheeks flush, and he looks down at the floor. It's a relief when his clothes are off and he can sink into the warm water of the bath.
Minseok is still looking at him, and he smiles when his eyes meet Lu Han's. "I often used to share a bath with my cousin when he lived with us," he comments, "but it's been many years since the last time I had company like this."
"For me too," Lu Han says.
Silence falls, but Lu Han doesn't mind. He finds himself relaxing, enjoying the bath and the ease of Minseok's company without worrying about what it means. His eyes drift shut, and he doesn't open them until Minseok asks, so soft Lu Han almost thinks he's imagining it, "Lu Han?"
"Yes?" Lu Han blinks against the light, and then his eyes land on Minseok and he's caught. Minseok's hair is wet and he's pushed it back so Lu Han can see his whole face, water droplets glistening on his eyelashes, making his eyes stand out. Lu Han can only stare, captivated. Minseok looks steadily back at him and Lu Han feels exposed, like Minseok can see everything he's thinking, but he can't look away.
The silence stretches out between them until Minseok says, still quiet, "I know you had no choice in marrying me." Lu Han frowns, wondering where this is going, but he doesn't interrupt. "I know you also have no choice in giving yourself to me if I ask it of you, but...perhaps I flatter myself, but it doesn't seem to me that you've been doing so out of obligation."
"No," Lu Han says simply. "I haven't." It's the first time either of them has put it out there so plainly, and it feels strange, but also like something of a relief, to be open about it, to know that Minseok understands that much.
Minseok hesitates again before he asks, "I think...we've become friends, have we not?"
"Yes," Lu Han answers too quickly. "That is, I think so too."
Minseok nods thoughtfully. He seems unsure of how to continue, but finally, he says, "And recently I've begun to think that it's not only friendship that has grown between us."
Lu Han's eyes go wide, hardly able to believe his ears. Is Minseok saying what Lu Han thinks he is? In answer to the unspoken question, Minseok suddenly moves closer. Lu Han's legs automatically separate to make room for Minseok to kneel between them. He's not so close, not as close as he's been many times before, but under the circumstances, Lu Han finds it hard to breathe.
Lu Han's not used to seeing such uncertainty in Minseok's eyes and it makes him want to throw his arms around Minseok, to hold him and protect him from anything. He knows Minseok is strong and doesn't need his protection, but the impulse is there all the same. He also wants very much to kiss Minseok, but he doesn't do that either, only waits for Minseok to say or do something else.
What he does, in the end, is bring his hands up out of the water and place them at the base of Lu Han's neck, then run them along his shoulders. It's only a light touch, nothing compared to the many ways Minseok has touched him before, but his hands are warm and Lu Han shivers. Minseok's hands rest on his shoulders as he leans in slowly and presses his lips to Lu Han's.
It's a soft, chaste kiss and perhaps it shouldn't feel significant when they've shared a bed every night for months, but the fact of the matter is that Minseok has never kissed him like this. Minseok has kissed him lightly and kissed him hard, kissed him hungrily as they twine together and kissed him lazily as they come down, but never just a kiss, not the start or middle or end of anything else.
It's so unexpected even after Minseok's words that Lu Han wonders if he's misunderstood, if Minseok is trying to start something now, but he only gives Lu Han one more brief kiss before he sits back again, smiling. Lu Han is still trying to process this when Minseok moves, not forward toward Lu Han or back to the other side of the bath but to the side, sitting next to Lu Han.
His body is pressed up against Lu Han's from shoulder to thigh and it feels intimate in a different way from the ways they've touched before. Minseok fits perfectly against Lu Han's side, and even better when Lu Han gives in to his impulse to drape his arm over Minseok's shoulders. Minseok tilts his head up and Lu Han takes the hint and leans down for another kiss, more lingering than before but still, Lu Han thinks, an expression not of desire but of affection.
When they break apart, Minseok drops his head onto Lu Han's chest, curling into him, and Lu Han thinks that he would stay like this forever if he could. It doesn't seem necessary to say more, their actions saying what their words don't, but Minseok murmurs, "Lu Han?"
"Yes?"
"I would like it if this...that is, if we could..." It's much more common for Lu Han to be tongue-tied than Minseok, so it makes Lu Han smile to hear him stumble over his words. Minseok sighs, and when he continues, there is wry amusement in his tone, but still utmost sincerity. "In any case, for now, I hope you don't mind staying like this for a while longer."
It's a silly (implied) question if Lu Han's ever heard one, with the way his arm is wrapped around Minseok to hold him close. "I don't," he answers anyway, and then, before he can think better of it, "I'd stay with you forever."
The pause before Minseok responds is just long enough for Lu Han to wonder if he's gone too far, but then he chuckles softly and presses his lips to Lu Han's chest before lifting his head for one more kiss. "Perhaps not in the bath," he says, grinning up at Lu Han, "but I'd very much like it if you would."
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: Lu Han/Minseok
Word Count: 1638
Summary: Lu Han's body is Minseok's to take, but he would gladly give him more. (arranged marriage AU)
Notes: Thank you to Kayleigh for the prompt. ♥
Lu Han has shared Minseok's bed since the first day they met, the day they were married. That is what tradition dictates, that he be Minseok's in more than just name, in body and soul. (Soul, of course, is more difficult to quantify, so the customs have always focused on the body.)
The first time was obligation, though not such an imposition. Lu Han thought Minseok attractive, and Minseok wasn't selfish, ensuring that they both enjoyed it. Since then, it has become something Lu Han appreciates more and more. He loves Minseok's body, loves the way Minseok makes him feel, and little by little, he's coming to love Minseok himself.
That part is not tradition, though there's nothing that forbids finding love in an arranged marriage. Lu Han knows he's lucky to have that much, to have a husband he cares this much for, a husband who values him, as a friend, if nothing else. He can be content with that.
He doesn't think Minseok feels the same, though he can't be sure. They've become friends in the months since their wedding, talking comfortably together and laughing often. When they're alone (with the servants), Minseok sits close to him and touches him without hesitation, but in a casual, friendly way.
It's clear when they're in bed together that Minseok wants him like that, that he delights in Lu Han's body and cares that Lu Han feel pleasure too, that he's able have Minseok the way he wants him, but Lu Han is not so naïve as to take that to mean that Minseok loves him. It is what it is, no more, no less. But it's something, and that will have to be enough.
One evening, some six months after their wedding, a servant comes to tell them that the bath is ready, as usual. Minseok always goes first by custom, and bathes alone, but today, for the first time, he hesitates, turning to Lu Han. "Would you perhaps like to join me?" There's something deliberately casual about the question, like he's going out of his way to make it seem unimportant.
Lu Han is surprised, though he tries not to show it. Minseok has never asked Lu Han to join him before in all the time they've been married, and he doesn't understand what it means. Is there some significance to sharing a bath in this land, something all his lessons on their customs failed to touch upon? Does Minseok only want to have Lu Han in a different way than usual? But Minseok is so meticulous about cleanliness that Lu Han can't imagine he'd want to sully his bath like that.
Minseok must guess what he's thinking because he smiles crookedly and clarifies, "The bath is large enough for both of us. I only thought...it would be nice to have some company."
"Of course," Lu Han answers readily even though he still doesn't understand. "I'd like that."
The servants help Minseok out of his clothes first, and Lu Han tries not to be too obvious about watching as the heavy clothes that camouflage his shape fall away to reveal Minseok's small but strong body. Minseok notices anyway, but he only flashes Lu Han a small smile before turning to step into the bath, sliding down until the water covers everything below his shoulders.
Then it's Lu Han's turn, and Minseok makes no attempt to hide his interest as Lu Han's body is exposed. He's seen it all before so it shouldn't matter so much to Lu Han, having Minseok's eyes on him, but it feels different like this. His cheeks flush, and he looks down at the floor. It's a relief when his clothes are off and he can sink into the warm water of the bath.
Minseok is still looking at him, and he smiles when his eyes meet Lu Han's. "I often used to share a bath with my cousin when he lived with us," he comments, "but it's been many years since the last time I had company like this."
"For me too," Lu Han says.
Silence falls, but Lu Han doesn't mind. He finds himself relaxing, enjoying the bath and the ease of Minseok's company without worrying about what it means. His eyes drift shut, and he doesn't open them until Minseok asks, so soft Lu Han almost thinks he's imagining it, "Lu Han?"
"Yes?" Lu Han blinks against the light, and then his eyes land on Minseok and he's caught. Minseok's hair is wet and he's pushed it back so Lu Han can see his whole face, water droplets glistening on his eyelashes, making his eyes stand out. Lu Han can only stare, captivated. Minseok looks steadily back at him and Lu Han feels exposed, like Minseok can see everything he's thinking, but he can't look away.
The silence stretches out between them until Minseok says, still quiet, "I know you had no choice in marrying me." Lu Han frowns, wondering where this is going, but he doesn't interrupt. "I know you also have no choice in giving yourself to me if I ask it of you, but...perhaps I flatter myself, but it doesn't seem to me that you've been doing so out of obligation."
"No," Lu Han says simply. "I haven't." It's the first time either of them has put it out there so plainly, and it feels strange, but also like something of a relief, to be open about it, to know that Minseok understands that much.
Minseok hesitates again before he asks, "I think...we've become friends, have we not?"
"Yes," Lu Han answers too quickly. "That is, I think so too."
Minseok nods thoughtfully. He seems unsure of how to continue, but finally, he says, "And recently I've begun to think that it's not only friendship that has grown between us."
Lu Han's eyes go wide, hardly able to believe his ears. Is Minseok saying what Lu Han thinks he is? In answer to the unspoken question, Minseok suddenly moves closer. Lu Han's legs automatically separate to make room for Minseok to kneel between them. He's not so close, not as close as he's been many times before, but under the circumstances, Lu Han finds it hard to breathe.
Lu Han's not used to seeing such uncertainty in Minseok's eyes and it makes him want to throw his arms around Minseok, to hold him and protect him from anything. He knows Minseok is strong and doesn't need his protection, but the impulse is there all the same. He also wants very much to kiss Minseok, but he doesn't do that either, only waits for Minseok to say or do something else.
What he does, in the end, is bring his hands up out of the water and place them at the base of Lu Han's neck, then run them along his shoulders. It's only a light touch, nothing compared to the many ways Minseok has touched him before, but his hands are warm and Lu Han shivers. Minseok's hands rest on his shoulders as he leans in slowly and presses his lips to Lu Han's.
It's a soft, chaste kiss and perhaps it shouldn't feel significant when they've shared a bed every night for months, but the fact of the matter is that Minseok has never kissed him like this. Minseok has kissed him lightly and kissed him hard, kissed him hungrily as they twine together and kissed him lazily as they come down, but never just a kiss, not the start or middle or end of anything else.
It's so unexpected even after Minseok's words that Lu Han wonders if he's misunderstood, if Minseok is trying to start something now, but he only gives Lu Han one more brief kiss before he sits back again, smiling. Lu Han is still trying to process this when Minseok moves, not forward toward Lu Han or back to the other side of the bath but to the side, sitting next to Lu Han.
His body is pressed up against Lu Han's from shoulder to thigh and it feels intimate in a different way from the ways they've touched before. Minseok fits perfectly against Lu Han's side, and even better when Lu Han gives in to his impulse to drape his arm over Minseok's shoulders. Minseok tilts his head up and Lu Han takes the hint and leans down for another kiss, more lingering than before but still, Lu Han thinks, an expression not of desire but of affection.
When they break apart, Minseok drops his head onto Lu Han's chest, curling into him, and Lu Han thinks that he would stay like this forever if he could. It doesn't seem necessary to say more, their actions saying what their words don't, but Minseok murmurs, "Lu Han?"
"Yes?"
"I would like it if this...that is, if we could..." It's much more common for Lu Han to be tongue-tied than Minseok, so it makes Lu Han smile to hear him stumble over his words. Minseok sighs, and when he continues, there is wry amusement in his tone, but still utmost sincerity. "In any case, for now, I hope you don't mind staying like this for a while longer."
It's a silly (implied) question if Lu Han's ever heard one, with the way his arm is wrapped around Minseok to hold him close. "I don't," he answers anyway, and then, before he can think better of it, "I'd stay with you forever."
The pause before Minseok responds is just long enough for Lu Han to wonder if he's gone too far, but then he chuckles softly and presses his lips to Lu Han's chest before lifting his head for one more kiss. "Perhaps not in the bath," he says, grinning up at Lu Han, "but I'd very much like it if you would."
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no subject
Date: 2015-05-30 07:57 am (UTC)ARRANGED MARRIAGE!!! BATHS! !! XIUHAN !!! YOU;RE!!!!
Okay I am clam not only am I clam but I am also very calm totally not freaking out with incohreerntcy But I could feel theiur intimacy and the nervousness and mINSEOK AND OH MY GOSH
you're beautiful this is beautiful let me hug you forever what thehell
It's a soft, chaste kiss and perhaps it shouldn't feel significant when they've shared a bed every night for months, but the fact of the matter is that Minseok has never kissed him like this. Minseok has kissed him lightly and kissed him hard, kissed him hungrily as they twine together and kissed him lazily as they come down, but never just a kiss, not the start or middle or end of anything else.
This right here has to be one of the most beautiful paragraphs I'm so moved by it because .YES oh gosh oh gosh
me and my emotions will go now
thank you so much for writing this
no subject
Date: 2015-05-31 05:16 am (UTC)